how to feed a baby

Congratulations, you had a baby!  Planning on breastfeeding?  Perfect!  It's the most natural form of feeding your newborn!  Your body knows just what to do!  Your baby knows exactly how to do it!  Your milk will come when it's called!  Hallelujah, you got through labor and now you're smooth sailing through infancy as your perfect body perfectly perfects the perfect art of perfect food for your perfect baby who is perfectly able to tell you when he/she needs your perfect food for their perfect life!

Ahem.

For those mamas out there who experienced breastfeeding like the above explanation, I envy you, because that is certainly not how it happened for me.  And for the first few weeks after I had NC, I had convinced myself that I was the only new mama in the world who had trouble breastfeeding and that for some reason, I was just ill-equipped.

As I briefly mentioned in my last post, I want this to be a safe place for us to discuss the real issues facing us as human beings, and today, as new mamas.  Not all of my posts will be this "graphic", but today, that's just how the cookie crumbled.  

So without further ado…How to Feed a Baby in 5 Easy Steps

at my suggestion

Well, hello, my dear internet cosmos.  It's so nice to run into you again.

Five months ago, my life changed.  Since then, I've been busy trying to learn how to live as a new person.  Someone who now has two bodies, two hearts, two brains, two breathing sets of lungs.  Someone who now has another being to take care of.

Turns out being pregnant wasn't the only time I would hold this other being inside of me.  In fact, I do so now.  Maybe even more than before.

When I was pregnant, all I had to worry about was how I took care of myself, and that would trickle down to take care of this thing inside of me.  But now, it's not just about me anymore.  Now I take care of myself, and I take care of a new being.  Now, I take care of a new life.  My daughter, NC.

Needless to say, it's been a transition.  Parts of it have been the most difficult of my life.  Others have been the most joyous and ecstatic moments I could never have imagined in my wildest dreams.  Luckily, the second kind have far outweighed the first.

Anyway, I've thought a lot about this blog during my time away.  What is this space?  What do I want to fill it with?  While navigating the beginning months of motherhood, I've learned a lot about myself, and a lot about what I would have wanted to read about before I embarked on this journey.  I've also learned a lot about what my real priorities are now.  The things I find truly beautiful and inspiring now are in a big way, much different than they were before.  Some things are the same, but so much has changed.

For example, I realize that this space is not merely here because someone named "D" suggested it.  This time, I'm here truly for myself and at my own insistence.  I'm back because I realize that I have a lot to say, and it's me who is suggesting to myself that it may just be time to let you all hear it.

So, this blog is no longer "at D's suggestion".  Now, it is all at my own suggestion, a collection of ideas put forward for your consideration.  Everything here is my own opinion put forth to you in hopes that you find it as appealing and inspiring as I do.

I hope you enjoy the continuation of this space, and that you find meaning in my explorations as I do.  I expect the content will be just as varied as before, with a much needed added dose of reality.  I want this space to be a safe place for exploring the real feelings and struggles that come with being a woman, a wife, a working outside of the home/working from home/stay at home mom, a human member of the global community.

So, my first suggestion is for you to join me.  I can't promise anything except that it will be an adventure.

XOXO
--mel

P.S.  If you are following me on a reader, please change your link to atmysuggestion.blogspot.com.  Or if you'd prefer, please enter your e-mail address at the top right of this page to get my posts in your inbox.

Do or Don't: Push Present

It seems the tradition of a "push present" hasn't really been around for very long, and is probably more prevalent in some circles than others (read: first world problems).  However, it is none the less intriguing.  I don't remember the first time I heard about a "push present", but I do recall a number of different instances when friends have brought it up.  And I suppose now is the time to educate those of you who have no freaking clue what I'm talking about...according to trusty 'ole Wikipedia, a "push present" is:

a present a father gives to the mother to mark the occasion of her giving birth to their child. In practice the present may be given before or after the birth, or even in the delivery room. The giving of push presents has supposedly grown in the United States in recent years. ^[1] A push gift is any type of present loved ones give to a woman who has recently given birth to a child.^[2] The name push gift although indicative of a vaginal delivery does not exclude those women who have given birth through a C-section."

(link)

Okay, back to the task at hand.  I came across an interesting NY Times article on the subject and I was intrigued to read the differing viewpoints.  I think the title of the article intrinsically states the opinion of the author:  "A Bundle of Joy Isn't Enough?"  Another opinion from a mom in the article:  “It’s a way to honor a mother giving her emotions, body and hormones over to a baby for nine months, culminating in an experience which, when done naturally, redefines the meaning of pain. And when not done naturally, it’s still an act of sacrifice."  And yet another opinion:  “I do not think that because a woman has had a baby she requires a Tiffany & Company item. She requires help, love and emotional support."  How about one more...:  “I wear those rings every day,” Ms. Allen said. “They symbolize my kids. There’s something about them that’s even more weighty than my wedding band.”

Anyway, my Mr. & I have certainly never been one to follow "tradition" and jewels and bling and big shiny objects of material affection have never really had much part in my vocabulary.  But I suppose I can understand wanting to commemorate such a special day with a little memorial charm or trinket, something to remind you always of the birth of your child.  Another consideration:  how different (or the same, for that matter) is this than the idea of an engagement ring or wedding band?

So, I wanna know:  what are your thoughts on "push presents"?  Is there a "right" and a "wrong" way to do it?  Never a good idea?  Sometimes a good idea?  Something that you secretly judge your friends for wanting?  Something you totally understand?

P.S.  I think something like this would be a sweet (and super chic) reminder of the day of a child's birth.  Or any other special occasion--weddings, birthdays, engagements, etc.  

Soft Gold Studio

 

The Return of Inspiration

I'm not going to lie, the last several weeks have been hard.  In the midst of trying to tie up approximately 14 billion loose ends at work and home before baby arrives, my Mr. went and broke his ankle, leaving us one leg down.  So with just the normal craziness that accompanies any self-employed business owner who is trying to make sure things are covered during her absence, I learned the very hard lesson of just how unbelievably valuable my Mr.'s second leg is.

I hear that the last couple months of pregnancy are supposed to be for turning inward, focusing on connecting with the creature who is about to rock your world forever, learning to quiet your mind and your spirit in preparation for the greatest most life-altering experience of all time.  However, I admit I've spent most of mine in the throws of panic and stress, slowing down every once in a while to come back above water and remind myself of just how blessed I am.  But for the sake of honesty, I'd be lying if I said I didn't go back to swimming around in the great "woe is me" for the better part of it all.

Anyway, my point is:  I'M BACK.  I don't know what happened but yesterday I woke up and I was finally excited to see the beauty and inspiration that I have found for so long in this great thing--my dear internet cosmos.  There's no explaining it.  Maybe I just had enough of this whole self-pity crap.  Maybe I realized that I have less than a month before the curtain rises (supposedly) and holy shit, that's a huge of load of reality!  Time to get back into the beauty.

So, how about a round-up of a few things that have helped to remind me of who I really am.  In no particular order of importance:

1.)  Peaches--all day, every day.

Chilled Tomato & Peach Soup

Peach & Raspberry Crumble

The famous Palisade Peaches

2.) Petra Borner drawings--I want to tattoo these all over my body. (found via Jessica Comingore)

3.) Cursing, and trying to figure out how to make that work with virgin ears coming my way.

Miss Phies Boutique

4.)  Dexter--I may or may not have watched all seven seasons and got up to date to the current season 8 in approximately 2.7 weeks.  Don't judge me.

5.) My boys.

*DISCLAIMER: the below photo of my Mr. was taken in more innocent times, times before the reality of rock climbing injuries and the always present probability possibility that one will indeed bust their ass on an outcropping and send said climber straight to the surgeon's table and into the "non-weight bearing" oblivion of 8-12 weeks.*

**DISCLAIMER TWO:  if you were drenched by disdain from my previous disclaimer, please forgive me.  I'm working through it.

Beer

For someone who really loves beer, Colorado is a great state to live in.  The New Yorker recently published an article in which they literally mapped the rise and abundance of craft breweries in the U.S.  Colorado ranked #3 for total number of craft breweries in the state and for total barrels of beer produced in 2012.  They also came in #5 for having 15 craft breweries for every 500,000 people in the state.  Not too shabby.

And because I know I have such adept and meticulous readers, I'll go ahead and jump ahead of the curve and assess the fact that yes, I am indeed writing a post about beer on a Monday morning while 30  weeks pregnant.  No need to worry, my dear internet cosmos, I am still firmly planted on the wagon.  

On a side note, I may or may not have already asked my Dr. if it's acceptable to crack open a beer right after delivery in the hospital.  And being that we live in CO, she may or may not have responded in support of the matter.

Check out the full interactive map here.  How'd your state do?

Warby Parker Sunglasses

I've had a long running love affair with Warby Parker and have been loyally sporting these frames ever since my big glasses search a couple years ago (remember?).  As much as I love my glasses, I find myself keeping them in the case rather than on my face much more often than I should.  What's my excuse?  I have none.  I'm just lazy and forgetful.

Anyway, I've recently been trying to be better about wearing my glasses more, as my vision is certainly not something that is going to get better without them.  And I'm thinking that it might be time to invest in a pair of prescription sunglasses so I can work on my peepers even while enjoying this lovely sunny state of mine.

Here are my current faves:

Everett

Jasper

Preston

So tell me, my dear internet cosmos, which ones are your favorites?
--MEL

HOW TO: Cook & Camp

Hopping in the car and heading off into the woods with my Mr. and the furry children is one of our favorite pastimes.  This is what we lovingly refer to as "car camping"--load up all your stuff, go park the car somewhere, unload all your stuff, set it up, enjoy the outdoors for a couple days, then load it back in the car and head home.  Easy peasy.

When we go car camping, we take advantage of the fact that we're not hiking in with only what we can wear on our backs.  Translation:  we turn our campground in into the freakin' Ritz.  We bring the camp stove and the skillets and the french press and the lanterns and the hammock and the speakers for the iPod.  To steal a slogan from a super ritzy local ski resort, it's "not exactly roughing it".

I think one thing that intimidates a lot of people about camping is what will be on the menu once you're out in the middle of nowhere.  This is where car camping becomes especially perfect.  You can cook up a straight feast in the woods with nothing more than a campfire, a grate that goes over the fire (a regular staple at most campgrounds), and a skillet.  And to kick it up to the next notch, you can buy a relatively inexpensive camp stove (we have this one and it's perfect) and french press and have almost all of your kitchen conveniences right outside your tent.

Some of my favorite camping recipes include:

Campfire Potatoes:

This recipe is intended for the grill at home, but if you par-boil and prep at home, you'll have little foil-wrapped potato packages ready to be thrown directly into the campfire when you arrive at your site.  I've eaten these along side campfire-frilled steaks and veggie-kabobs roasted over an open fire.  Oh, and don't forget your favorite wine and the perfect little stainless steel wine glasses to drink from.  Perfect.  

Campfire Cakes:

Who says s'mores are the only way to go?  What happens when you put boxed cake mix into hollowed out oranges, wrap in foil, and throw into the campfire?  Heaven, I tell you.  Here are two recipes that will get you there.  I recommend using dark fudgy chocolate cake and adding chocolate chips.  The chocolate cake becomes infused with the orange that it's baking in and there is certainly nothing wrong with that.

Campfire Pancakes:

I can't remember a time we've gone car camping and not woken up and made pancakes in the morning. Bring a good skillet and whip up a batch of your favorite pancakes (this one looks particularly yummy) in no time over the open fire or on your handy dandy camp stove.  Make sure to bring a kettle or pot to boil water for your freshly brewed french press coffee as well.  

Now get out and enjoy the outdoors!  

--MEL